I like Paul Blart: Mall Cop. The film’s enjoyably goofy, satirically funny, and surprisingly sweet thanks to its very likable protagonist Paul Blart (played by the loveable Kevin James). Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 is the opposite—it’s boring, remarkably trite, and unexpectedly dark despite its PG rating. In the first two minutes Mall Cop 2 harshly divorces Blart from the previous film’s love interest (after only six days married), then brutally kills his mother with a milk truck! It’s an incredibly dark and depressing way to begin a supposed family film. Mall Cop 2 then hits the sequel reset button (which I despise in stories), repeating the near exact premise in a different setting—making Mall Cop 2 remarkably comparable to Die Hard 2 (following the pattern of Mall Cop being a parody to Die Hard). Similar to how Die Hard 2 fails as an action film (I’ll make a mental note to review why I hate Die Hard 2), so does Mall Cop 2 fail as a comedy.
Mall Cop 2 reuses most of the original’s jokes, with new comedic material being scarce to find. The film’s first two-thirds contain zero effective comedy. I didn’t laugh once, staring vacantly at a film desperately attempting to replicate the same comedic charm as last time. As with the original, the last third is Mall Cop 2’s most enjoyable part, satirizing action genre series such as Die Hard, James Bond, and Taken—yet the few chuckles I got (the funniest scene being when Paul Blart and the generic boss villain have a shouting contest over who’s crazier) were hardly enough to redeem the first two-thirds, or the last third for that matter. The naturally likable Kevin James can be a very funny lead actor when placed under the right conditions and writers (i.e. The King of Queens, Paul Blart: Mall Cop), yet he’s regrettably been choosing the wrong films and wrong writers—with Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 a perfect example of such unfortunate talent wasted.